Conflicted

I think I realized something today. I cant function without something to look forward to. I had a lot of fun at prom, and that weekend in Oregon was exactly what I needed. I trip back in time, to my old life. But now I’m back in this wretched place, crying myself to sleep again. I am so tired today. I feel like my molecular structure may very well fall apart. Summer is almost here, and I almost wish it wouldnt. I’m just going to sit home for 3 months with my 3 online classes and my ever deepening depression. No trips home.
I turn 18 this summer. And I’ll be a senior next year. Wooo. I dont get to share that with my friends. I dont get to graduate with Tigard’s class of 2011. I dont get to go to my friend’s grad parties and my friends dont get to come to mine. I’ll walk, in purple. Not green. There wont be friendly faces looking up at me from the group of grads walking with me. Just people I dont know. “Rebekah Michele Ingram….” “wooooooo” …………………

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